A Good afternoon to you all. My name is Anne Bonny. That’s PIRATE Anne Bonny. Oh yes, there were female pirates a-plenty, but we dressed like the boys so mostly, nobody knew we was there.
I was born in Ireland, the daughter of a la-de-da lawyer who diddled a housemaid and then forgot about her. With no family life to speak of I was glad when pirate James Bonny swept me off me feet. We was married and he brought me with him to his home in South Carolina. Well, let me tell you that South Carolina in the 1700’s was a hotbed of piracy and I soon discovered that my fierce pirate Jamey was nothing but a small fish. I left him for a better catch - Calico Jack Rackham. Ye might know my Jack as the man who flew the first pirate skull-and-crossbones flag.
I sailed aboard my Jack’s ship dressed as a man and fighting alongside the men, at least as good as they were, probably better. The first it was discovered that there was a woman aboard, the gent who found me out raised such a fuss that I knifed him through the heart just to keep him quiet. He would have been so shocked he’d have risen from the dead if he’d known that there was at least one other woman, me pal Mary Read, aboard that ship, disguised as a man.
We attacked ships and seaside settlements all along the Atlantic coast and I must say I always enjoyed visiting your fair city of New Brunswick. The boats around New Brunswick harbor smuggling in rich French fabrics and English hats always made fine picking and a good profit. And there’s something satisfying about a pirate robbing a smuggler, don’t you think?
After a splendid career of piracy, we was finally cornered by scurvy pirate-hunters. Me pal Mary and me fought bravely and well while most of the crew, including me louse of a husband Calico Jack, cowered in the hold. We all was caught and went on trial. I had a bun in the oven at the time, and me execution was postponed until I gave birth. The coward Calico Jack hung and me last words to him was "I'm sorry to see you here, Jack, but if you'd have fought like a man you needn't hang like a dog."
As for me, I never did hang and they say what happened to me and babe afterward was unknown. But I’ll tell ye that it’s good to be a smart, strong, sexy woman, even - no ESPECIALLY - in a world of men. My name is Anne Bonny, pirate.